Elissa and I (Kari) had the opportunity to interview our friend Raafe Khan who shared his expertise and knowledge of India. We met at a bubble tea shop, shared a mango ice cream dessert, and enjoyed our lively conversation with one another. The interview centers around food, traditions, and etiquette. Raafe even shared his cooking secrets with us, and his recipes were featured in our July Culture Kids Cafe.
We hope you enjoy this first hand look into Indian culture from Raafe's perspective.
Kari: In general, tell us your story about coming to the US and who you are.
Raafe: My name is Raafe. I was born and brought up in India. Born in the northern belt in a small village which is in the foothills of the Himalayas. I was born there, and then my family moved to Mumbai, which is a pretty well known city on the western coast of India. I grew up there, spent my formative years in Mumbai. Went to high school there.
I got my undergrad degree in India from Manipal Academy of Higher Education in electrical engineering. Back then my focus was on renewable energy. At the time there wasn’t a lot of renewable energy back in India and neither was there any incentive to work there. So I started my career in the banking industry and the oil and gas sector. I didn’t see a future there for myself. I strongly believe in creating a better future for the next generation, so I decided to pivot and enrolled myself in a master’s program in renewable energy at Carnegie Mellon University. I got my master’s there, and as soon as I graduated I joined Mortenson Construction in Minneapolis. I have been at Mortensen for about a year and a half working on building clean energy, mainly wind and solar. It is rewarding to see the impact we are having on communities today. Hopefully that would propagate through time and help create a better future for the kids to come.
Elissa: We are meeting because we are looking to expand our Culture Kids menu, and whenever we do that we want to be able to honor the cultures that the different foods are coming from and learn about them as well and what is traditional, what is not traditional, things that have been Americanized, or have stayed true since being here.
So the first question I have for you in terms of food is what is eaten, in what order, and how often?
Raafe: Great question. I do need to be more specific. The reason for that is India is a very diverse country. It’s an amalgamation of different cultures. The southern part of India has its own kind of culture. The cuisine is very rice-based. The northern belt where I was born has a curry-base cuisine. The west and east have their own thing going on. So depending on where you’re from, the food is very different and the spice levels vary across the country so there’s not any standard. But typically on a random day I would say breakfast is pretty standard, like eggs, toast, stuff like that. Lunch and dinner, depending on where you are, could be a rice-based menu or a curry-based menu or both. It really depends on geographically where you are located. There is no set standard.
Elissa: Do people typically take tea or coffee throughout the day?
Raafe: It is very similar to how it is in the western part of the world where you have coffee anytime of the day you need it. We don’t have supper breaks or stuff like that.
Elissa: What foods are your favorites?
Raafe: My favorite food is something called butter chicken which is a creamy tomato-based curry with chicken cubes in it typically. It’s not a whole lot of spicy, but it’s my favorite and has the right amount of spice for me and just the right amount of creaminess. That’s my favorite thing to have whether it’s breakfast, lunch, or dinner. But the other thing which I do love having as on the side to drink is something called lassi which is a yogurt-based drink. Typically you can have it either sweet or salty. I like it sweet. That’s kind of my thing.
Elissa: Are there any food taboos where you can’t mix this with that or you can’t eat this at the same time you are doing this?
Raafe: Here’s the thing, there aren’t any food taboos as such. At least none that I know of. I do a pretty bad job at actually mixing stuff. My background is I was born in the north. I grew up on the west coast of India, studied in the south, and lived and worked for a brief time in the east. So because I lived in different parts of India, I was exposed to different cultures, different cuisines. I was guilty of mixing the eastern side of things with the western side, north and south, all different permutations and combinations. I’d like to say that is not something people do in their everyday lives, but I have done that so I would say there are maybe some food taboos I have tried out myself.
Elissa: I know there are some religions who do not eat certain foods. Can you speak to that specifically?
Raafe: The majority of India is Hindu. It’s about 70-75% Hindu. In Hindu religion the cow is a sacred animal because it provides milk and all kinds of products which people historically used for making ends meet. They’ve used cow dung as a fuel. They’ve used milk and all kinds of stuff. The cow is a very sacred and revered animal across India. There are some sections of society which do not eat beef. That is primarily Hindu. But again, there is no right or wrong answer. It just depends where you are from. So people from the central, midwest part of India don’t really eat cow meat or beef, but if you go to the east it is a delicacy in that part of the country. It is a very religious, culture-based kind of thing.
Elissa: Are there any rules that are observed during mealtime?
Raafe: That’s a great question. Because I have lived in different parts of the country, there are certain sections of society which like to sit down on the floor and eat their food typically with their hands. There are some sections of society which, most like in the western world, sit around the table and have normal table etiquette. In general, I think Indians really enjoy having their meals silently without having to watch television or listen to music. Family life is very important to people. Meals are what bring people together to talk about what happened in their day and about their problems and how family can solve that kind of stuff.
Elissa: Is there anything in terms of generals, can everyone eat together or is it separate at all? I know some cultures are that way.
Raafe: No, it’s not really separate. If everyone is together, they eat together. It’s not a rule, it’s just so culturally ingrained into people that it’s come down from generations before us. There’s no kind of division there.
Elissa: I know there are cultures where the men of the house get served first or the grandparents get served first. Does that happen?
Raafe: My grandparents are 90+ so they definitely get served first because their timings aren’t synchronized with us. In general we try to have everyone together.
Going back in time, if you go about 50-60 years back when we got independence from the British, there wasn’t a whole lot of equality, to be honest with you. It is still prevalent in parts of India today where as you said the man gets served first. However, that has changed a lot since back then. I think we have become a very progressive society that way. But it is true that used to happen. I have seen it firsthand where the wife or women of the house did not eat until the man or men of the house ate first.
Elissa: Is there a specific way to request more food, or say, “I’m done,” or refuse?
Raafe: No, I don’t think there is a set way of doing that. It is what it is.
Kari: For some cultures if you eat all the food on your plate that means you want more.
Raafe: You basically ask for more. You request for more food.
Elissa: What social obligations are there with regard to food giving, preparation, reciprocity, and honoring people? In terms of sharing food, if you go visit someone’s house do you bring an item of food?
Raafe: Gift giving is a part of our culture. Whenever we meet someone after a long time or it’s a dear friend or extended family, we do take food. But it’s more like sweets. Indian sweets are pretty popular. It’s a very popular item to take to someone’s house as a token of appreciation. Sweet giving I have done before, and I can tell you that it’s awesome. If you have a sweet tooth and you live in India, you will never go hungry. So have a lot of Indian friends.
Elissa: Are there any medicinal uses made for food or categories of food?
Raafe: There’s a saying that food is medicine and medicine is food. That’s kind of over simplifying it, but that’s what it kind of is. There’s a very big focus on mindful eating, whether it’s as simple as just having naan and vegetables. Mindful eating is something that we really focus on. There are some foods which are known to have medicinal properties like turmeric. When I used to fall sick and get a cold, my grandmom would make me warm milk and sprinkle turmeric and sugar. It would be a yellow concoction of witchcraft and wizardry, but I always thought it was pretty cool that it worked. That’s one example that “food is medicine and medicine is food.”
Elissa: Are there connections between food and health?
Raafe: They pretty much go hand-in-hand. India is a country that has been aloof from a lot of things happening, especially globalization. When it happened in the 70s, India wasn’t a part of that. It only took part in the globalization process in the 90s. Because of that there has been an influx in westernization. In the 90s McDonald’s came. It was a big hit. I believe there is a research paper out there that says since McDonald’s has been in India the BMI of Indians has gone up. People are eating a lot of burgers, calzones, pizzas, stuff like that. Things are changing, but I think the core values stick with us. We may not practice it everyday, but it’s alright.
Elissa: What are some taboos associated with the handling, offering, or discarding of food?
Raafe: It is very circumstantial. In my home where I come from, if we have food which is leftover, we eat it the next day. For example, a wedding that you have hundreds of people coming in and have a lot of food left, at least I can speak for my own family, we used to donate it to the unfortunate, underprivileged section of society. We never waste our food. It is very circumstantial.
Elissa: Do you have any last words or thoughts you want to share about Indian food?
Raafe: If you haven’t tried it, I would highly encourage you to try it. It’s always nice to immerse yourself in different cultures, and food is a great way to experience that. More than having Indian food, I highly encourage everybody reading this blog to visit India and experience the culture firsthand. It’s a large country with a lot of people, a lot of good hearts, and smiling faces. The diverse culture and all the excitement about India is better experienced if you are right there in the heart of things.
Elissa: Thank you. That was wonderful. I actually learned a lot.
Raafe: Thanks, guys.
We hope you enjoy this first hand look into Indian culture from Raafe's perspective.
Kari: In general, tell us your story about coming to the US and who you are.
Raafe: My name is Raafe. I was born and brought up in India. Born in the northern belt in a small village which is in the foothills of the Himalayas. I was born there, and then my family moved to Mumbai, which is a pretty well known city on the western coast of India. I grew up there, spent my formative years in Mumbai. Went to high school there.
I got my undergrad degree in India from Manipal Academy of Higher Education in electrical engineering. Back then my focus was on renewable energy. At the time there wasn’t a lot of renewable energy back in India and neither was there any incentive to work there. So I started my career in the banking industry and the oil and gas sector. I didn’t see a future there for myself. I strongly believe in creating a better future for the next generation, so I decided to pivot and enrolled myself in a master’s program in renewable energy at Carnegie Mellon University. I got my master’s there, and as soon as I graduated I joined Mortenson Construction in Minneapolis. I have been at Mortensen for about a year and a half working on building clean energy, mainly wind and solar. It is rewarding to see the impact we are having on communities today. Hopefully that would propagate through time and help create a better future for the kids to come.
Elissa: We are meeting because we are looking to expand our Culture Kids menu, and whenever we do that we want to be able to honor the cultures that the different foods are coming from and learn about them as well and what is traditional, what is not traditional, things that have been Americanized, or have stayed true since being here.
So the first question I have for you in terms of food is what is eaten, in what order, and how often?
Raafe: Great question. I do need to be more specific. The reason for that is India is a very diverse country. It’s an amalgamation of different cultures. The southern part of India has its own kind of culture. The cuisine is very rice-based. The northern belt where I was born has a curry-base cuisine. The west and east have their own thing going on. So depending on where you’re from, the food is very different and the spice levels vary across the country so there’s not any standard. But typically on a random day I would say breakfast is pretty standard, like eggs, toast, stuff like that. Lunch and dinner, depending on where you are, could be a rice-based menu or a curry-based menu or both. It really depends on geographically where you are located. There is no set standard.
Elissa: Do people typically take tea or coffee throughout the day?
Raafe: It is very similar to how it is in the western part of the world where you have coffee anytime of the day you need it. We don’t have supper breaks or stuff like that.
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| Mango ice cream we shared during the interview. |
Raafe: My favorite food is something called butter chicken which is a creamy tomato-based curry with chicken cubes in it typically. It’s not a whole lot of spicy, but it’s my favorite and has the right amount of spice for me and just the right amount of creaminess. That’s my favorite thing to have whether it’s breakfast, lunch, or dinner. But the other thing which I do love having as on the side to drink is something called lassi which is a yogurt-based drink. Typically you can have it either sweet or salty. I like it sweet. That’s kind of my thing.
Elissa: Are there any food taboos where you can’t mix this with that or you can’t eat this at the same time you are doing this?
Raafe: Here’s the thing, there aren’t any food taboos as such. At least none that I know of. I do a pretty bad job at actually mixing stuff. My background is I was born in the north. I grew up on the west coast of India, studied in the south, and lived and worked for a brief time in the east. So because I lived in different parts of India, I was exposed to different cultures, different cuisines. I was guilty of mixing the eastern side of things with the western side, north and south, all different permutations and combinations. I’d like to say that is not something people do in their everyday lives, but I have done that so I would say there are maybe some food taboos I have tried out myself.
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| Indian currency |
Raafe: The majority of India is Hindu. It’s about 70-75% Hindu. In Hindu religion the cow is a sacred animal because it provides milk and all kinds of products which people historically used for making ends meet. They’ve used cow dung as a fuel. They’ve used milk and all kinds of stuff. The cow is a very sacred and revered animal across India. There are some sections of society which do not eat beef. That is primarily Hindu. But again, there is no right or wrong answer. It just depends where you are from. So people from the central, midwest part of India don’t really eat cow meat or beef, but if you go to the east it is a delicacy in that part of the country. It is a very religious, culture-based kind of thing.
Elissa: Are there any rules that are observed during mealtime?
Raafe: That’s a great question. Because I have lived in different parts of the country, there are certain sections of society which like to sit down on the floor and eat their food typically with their hands. There are some sections of society which, most like in the western world, sit around the table and have normal table etiquette. In general, I think Indians really enjoy having their meals silently without having to watch television or listen to music. Family life is very important to people. Meals are what bring people together to talk about what happened in their day and about their problems and how family can solve that kind of stuff.
Elissa: Is there anything in terms of generals, can everyone eat together or is it separate at all? I know some cultures are that way.
Raafe: No, it’s not really separate. If everyone is together, they eat together. It’s not a rule, it’s just so culturally ingrained into people that it’s come down from generations before us. There’s no kind of division there.
Elissa: I know there are cultures where the men of the house get served first or the grandparents get served first. Does that happen?Raafe: My grandparents are 90+ so they definitely get served first because their timings aren’t synchronized with us. In general we try to have everyone together.
Going back in time, if you go about 50-60 years back when we got independence from the British, there wasn’t a whole lot of equality, to be honest with you. It is still prevalent in parts of India today where as you said the man gets served first. However, that has changed a lot since back then. I think we have become a very progressive society that way. But it is true that used to happen. I have seen it firsthand where the wife or women of the house did not eat until the man or men of the house ate first.
Elissa: Is there a specific way to request more food, or say, “I’m done,” or refuse?
Raafe: No, I don’t think there is a set way of doing that. It is what it is.
Kari: For some cultures if you eat all the food on your plate that means you want more.
Raafe: You basically ask for more. You request for more food.
Elissa: What social obligations are there with regard to food giving, preparation, reciprocity, and honoring people? In terms of sharing food, if you go visit someone’s house do you bring an item of food?
Raafe: Gift giving is a part of our culture. Whenever we meet someone after a long time or it’s a dear friend or extended family, we do take food. But it’s more like sweets. Indian sweets are pretty popular. It’s a very popular item to take to someone’s house as a token of appreciation. Sweet giving I have done before, and I can tell you that it’s awesome. If you have a sweet tooth and you live in India, you will never go hungry. So have a lot of Indian friends.
Elissa: Are there any medicinal uses made for food or categories of food?
Raafe: There’s a saying that food is medicine and medicine is food. That’s kind of over simplifying it, but that’s what it kind of is. There’s a very big focus on mindful eating, whether it’s as simple as just having naan and vegetables. Mindful eating is something that we really focus on. There are some foods which are known to have medicinal properties like turmeric. When I used to fall sick and get a cold, my grandmom would make me warm milk and sprinkle turmeric and sugar. It would be a yellow concoction of witchcraft and wizardry, but I always thought it was pretty cool that it worked. That’s one example that “food is medicine and medicine is food.”
Elissa: Are there connections between food and health?
Raafe: They pretty much go hand-in-hand. India is a country that has been aloof from a lot of things happening, especially globalization. When it happened in the 70s, India wasn’t a part of that. It only took part in the globalization process in the 90s. Because of that there has been an influx in westernization. In the 90s McDonald’s came. It was a big hit. I believe there is a research paper out there that says since McDonald’s has been in India the BMI of Indians has gone up. People are eating a lot of burgers, calzones, pizzas, stuff like that. Things are changing, but I think the core values stick with us. We may not practice it everyday, but it’s alright.
Elissa: What are some taboos associated with the handling, offering, or discarding of food?Raafe: It is very circumstantial. In my home where I come from, if we have food which is leftover, we eat it the next day. For example, a wedding that you have hundreds of people coming in and have a lot of food left, at least I can speak for my own family, we used to donate it to the unfortunate, underprivileged section of society. We never waste our food. It is very circumstantial.
Elissa: Do you have any last words or thoughts you want to share about Indian food?
Raafe: If you haven’t tried it, I would highly encourage you to try it. It’s always nice to immerse yourself in different cultures, and food is a great way to experience that. More than having Indian food, I highly encourage everybody reading this blog to visit India and experience the culture firsthand. It’s a large country with a lot of people, a lot of good hearts, and smiling faces. The diverse culture and all the excitement about India is better experienced if you are right there in the heart of things.
Elissa: Thank you. That was wonderful. I actually learned a lot.
Raafe: Thanks, guys.
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